第三篇

Children and Parents Do parents owe their children something Yes, they owe them a great deal. One of their chief obligations is to give their children a sense of personal worth, for self-esteem is the basis of good mental health. A youngster(青少年)who is constantly made to feel stupid and unworthy, constantly compared to brighter brothers, sisters, or cousins, will become so unsure that he (or she) won’t try at all. Of course, they should be corrected when they do wrong; this is the way children learn. But the criticisms should be balanced with praises, perhaps with a smile and a kiss. No child is ever too old to be hugged(拥抱). Parents owe their children firm guidance and consistent discipline. It is frightening for a youngster to feel that he is in charge of himself; it’s like being in a car without brakes(制动器,刹车). The parent who says "no" when other parents say "yes" sends a double message. He is also saying: "I love you, and I am ready to risk your anger, because I don’t want you to get into trouble." Parents owe their children a comfortable feeling about their body, and enough information about sex to balance the misinformation that they will surely receive from their friends. Parents owe their children a set of solid values around which to build their lives. This means teaching them to respect the rights and opinions of others; it means being respectful to eiders, to teachers, and to the law. The best way to teach such values is by example. A child who is lied to will lie. A child who sees his parents steal tools from the factory will think that it is all right to steal.

What is the "double message "a parent sends to his children when he says "no"